The Greatest Of All Time

What a game.

I can’t say I always enjoy sitting for four hours to watch football, but yesterday was totally worth it.

I started watching at a bar with one of my best friends, and we sipped milkshakes as we watched the Falcons get a couple of touchdowns. I knew Robert was probably not super happy about how the game was going, but I am a fierce optimist, so I kept saying to myself that the Patriots could still make a comeback. I actually felt really at peace most of the game, not because I didn’t feel invested, but I just had one of those crazy gut feelings that the Patriots would come through. I’d be lying if I said my heart wasn’t racing the last ten minutes of the game or in overtime, but it was just one of those weird moments where I felt like I knew everything would work out in my favor (As a sidenote, I am so sorry if you are a Falcons fan. That must have been really tough to watch; I feel pretty bad for everyone involved in that organization right now).

The Patriots have been a pretty big part of this past year for me, as I’ve been working on the Tom Brady project and kind of converted to becoming a Patriots fan. In the past I haven’t changed my sports teams for a guy — though I did date a Cowboys fan once, which was convenient for football games — but the Patriots have been different. I love the energy the fans have, and I actually genuinely like a lot of the players on the team. The more I see about the organization the more I really fall for it.

brady.jpg
Photo taken from Tom Brady’s Facebook

At first I enjoyed going and watching the Patriots play the Cowboys with Robert and having a friendly rivalry, but throughout his deployment I have grown incredibly fond of the New England team. They will always have a special place in my heart, and I have made the bittersweet decision to trade out my Tony Romo jersey for a Tom Brady one next season. I had already been trying to figure out who I was going to go for, as Romo has had a rough year, but instead of grabbing a Jason Witten or Dez Bryant jersey, my heart is leading me in a different direction. I will always love the Cowboys, but now I have two teams my heart feels really happy about. It will be interesting to see who I choose to root for when the Cowboys make a comeback to play the Patriots in the next Super Bowl. That will be the true test to see who my loyalty really lies with. 😉

Winning The Breakup

You know when you first break up with someone the feeling that you want to “win” the breakup? You tell your new ex that they’re going to regret their decision a lot longer than you will and you hope you’re right, even though you don’t really believe a heart can hurt as much as yours does at that very minute.

I am not proud to admit that’s how I felt when one of my exes and I broke up. He and I saw our breakup for what it was — the right thing to do for both of us. That didn’t make it easy or fun, though. I think when you deal with something as difficult as losing a loved one you don’t like going through it alone. Knowing someone feels the exact same way as you do and misses the exact same memories deep down in the pit of his stomach the way you do brings a little bit of comfort, even if it is superficial and fleeting.

The more I have dealt with losing people and the more my heart has healed and become secure, the more I realize how ridiculous this sentiment is.

I’ve seen exes again who clearly are still not over our relationship and it breaks my heart. Just because these people aren’t in my life anymore doesn’t mean they’re not still living, breathing human beings with feelings of their own. Lately I’ve found myself praying for a few of these gentleman and you know what is absolutely crazy? One of the last prayers I said I started to pour out my heart to God and asked Him to find a great girl who is a better fit for the man who hurt me the most. None of this is because I am a decent human being; this has been 100% Jesus Christ working to change my heart. I never would have been able to get to this place on my own, and frankly I can’t believe how absolutely genuine my desire is.

man alone.png

I wrote a letter to all of my exes that I’ll be sharing later this week. I really do hope they are all doing well, and I hope each and every one of them can find a way to move on from our relationship if they haven’t already. My hopes in writing the letter is not only to give them a sense of closure, (If any of them still read my blog, that is!) but I also hope anyone else who is having a hard time getting over a relationship can read it and connect to the words I wrote and find a way to move on.