Someone asked me recently whether I was genuinely as happy as I seem, or if it was just an act.
This question really took me off guard.
First, I feel like I’ve been brutally honest with a lot of my struggles on this blog — a very public place. He must just not read this.
Second, I don’t think anyone should aim to “be happy.” I think happiness is an emotion, which is more fleeting than a state of being. I have learned that the best thing to aim for is contentment. You can, of course, throw in sprinkles of happiness all throughout your day, but frankly being happy all day long kind of reminds me of a super-hyper yippie dog. That seems exhausting and, frankly, unrealistic for a human.
Third, I think assuming anything from social media is a very slippery slope. Granted, I have a zillion different ways of communicating, as I’m pretty into social media, but even analyzing my Instagram, Facebook, Venmo, Spotify, and blog is not enough — you still don’t have the full picture of my life by these little pieces to the Krista puzzle. My meals are rarely as beautiful as they appear on Instagram, the mortifying moments I post on my Facebook page are sometimes hilarious in the moment, but others are genuinely horrifying until they are an afterthought, and then there are pieces of my heart you really won’t get to know unless you spend time with me in person.
My intention is to be super-honest on here, as I’ve found people often benefit from not feeling as alone with their struggles in life, but there is only so much time in the day to spend writing about my life.
So in short: Yes, guy, you caught me. I’ve been really genuinely happy a lot lately. My life is nowhere near perfect, but I am able to smile and laugh again, and when it rains I choose to dance in it more often than not. Sometimes, though, I do break down and sit as the rain falls on my face until it stops. And then, I bask in the warm feeling of contentment.
This picture was taken by my beautiful friend Audrey, who also did my hair and makeup for our shoot. Check her out if you’re in the DMV!