I got a glimpse into one of the most hilarious corners of adult life this week — the Facebook Marketplace.
Being a homeowner has been fun because I love our place, but it’s also a whole lot of work. We are redoing our back yard right now, and dug up about 400 cobblestones that must have been put in as some sort of underground patio by the last owners. These things are easily a pound each, and it would not be fun taking them all to the dump, so I listed them on Facebook Marketplace to get rid of them. Guys. My phone blew up.
“Hi, is this item available?”
“Hello, I’d like to come take a look at the cobblestones.”
“Hey, when can I come pick up the stones?”
“I can come get them today, give me your address.”
I got dozens of messages in the matter of minutes, and they just kept coming. It was amusing, but also stressful enough that I didn’t check my Facebook messages for a few days after creating my listing. When I finally had the patience and courage to sort through everything, I signed on to weed through all the people who wanted our cobblestones. My method was pretty simple. Women got priority because I would rather have a woman come to my house than a man (Why? Check out my last post). Then they got eliminated from the list if their profile picture wasn’t of them. I love dogs more than just about anyone, but I’d like to know whoever is coming over doesn’t mind putting her face out there for me to see. Finally, the easiest part was that I just gave whoever reached out first the priority. This whole week I’ve been bombarded with more messages that I could have ever imagined, been ghosted by people who claimed to want the stones, and finally met up with a really nice couple who is going to use them on their horse farm.
As anxiety-inducing as the Facebook Marketplace is, I’d definitely recommend it to anyone trying to get rid of any sort of home goods. People on there are sharks just waiting for something to chomp down on, and if you don’t feel like hauling something away, your trash could be another person’s treasure.
What do you think one of the most hilarious things about being in your late twenties or early thirties is? Do you have any experience with the crazy world of Facebook Marketplace?